No bitching and more science? Damn! - January '09 to July '09
"In the never-ending saga of 'Billy wets himself,' he had another incident today." - Gina
"That would break your nose, they're still hard balls." -Sean
"It was like a stuttering sheep." -Gina about Brian's rockbanding of "Bad to the Bone"
"Bbbbbbbbbbad to the wooooool..." -Sean
"You couldn't even pull my ass out of a bar long enough to have a kid at 24." -Gina
"He gave you head - how do you feel about that?" -Kristin to Sean
"But it's not hot if you compare it to other places which are hotter." -Lynn
"Vaginas are not a virtue. That's a common mistake." -Sean
"I don't know how you can do that - I can't even cope with three fingers." -Lynn
"Why don't you come back to our place and take off your boxers?" -SusanT
"I even know Bernoulli and I like Jesus." -Our kickball ref, while playing cups
"If he goes to Jarrod, I'm totally saying no." -Rebecca
"I do like the fistfights over the balls." -Lynn watching basketball
"I hear Britney in my boobs." -Gina, who then pulled her headphones out of them
"Me and my mom are going to Clermont, I don't know about you guys." -Rebecca's Sally's Eric
"I'd like to get it to remind me that I AM killing people." -Spam about an engineering ring
"Cottage cheese bothers me because it reminds me of vaginal discharge." -Spam
"Shooting a young buck is like slapping a woman. Sure you can do it..." -Borden
"Any cat's name, if it's in the street, it's named 'thump'." -Borden
"Rebecca!" -Jillian
"What?" -RebeccaK
"Seven plus six IS thirteen!"
"...yeah."
"That sucks!"
"I've never seen anyone give fake head that effectively." -Jillian
"I've gotta see the tongue before I'm really impressed, though." -Bjorn, about a guy dressed in a KISS costume
"You're just getting all these men wrapped around your finger." -me
"They wrap themselves around my finger. I just don't pry them off." -Andrea
"I thought about coming here and apologizing for being late because I had to get my pussy shaved." -Emily, who needed to get her cat's butt trimmed
"Shuo made me put a skirt on, but I'm gonna take it off." -Rebecca
"People who get set on fire die." -RebeccaJ.
"You said dead dog, and I just kind of went with it." -Pottery Meg, who then told a story about a dead cat left in a field
"I am become fail, the destroyer of awesomeness." -Tommy
"Accelerometer sounds like a thing that makes your car go fast." -RebeccaK
"I have an ex-boyfriend who's kind of like a ferret." -Jillian
"Dammit, Edward, get your butt outta her face!" -Girl to guy dancing in front of bus-bar-tour driver
"He ain't got nothing to work with!" -driver
"I'm raping your shirt." -KatieMo to Tommy
"If I'm one day able to move my boobs, you WILL watch. I'll make you." -RyanH
"I euphemism'd your mother." -Spam
"What are you doing? Oh, is that what you're going to bang people with?" -Lydia about Eric mounting a gun made of cardboard
"You're not that old. You're what, like... 27? You're not like 'Mere' old." -RyanH
"Let's see how many times we can eat our poop and poop it back out." -Kristin speaking for her fish pre-birthday
"I think your anus probably thanks you." -Noelle @ Kristin's birthday
"I was the only one who wanted to bootyshake." -Jim's GF @ Kristin's bday
"Don't let her size fool you, she's tricky." -SeanB abt Andrea
"Stop snorting, I'm gonna come at you like a spider monkey." -Mallory
"I like to think it's Alice from the Brady Bunch." -Galen, about "WhoTFis Alice" song
"Now that's a tasty bitch." -Mere
"I have a bruise on my boob from my sister. Right now." -RyanH
"I want to poke something dead." -Tulika
"If I weren't already wetting myself, I would've wet myself." -Jen's Nate
"He's like a young Fidel." -Travis about Chris
"Why are you constantly flicking all the time?" -Tulika
"Fundamentally, I really don't want to be using the same toilet as the cat anyway." -Brian about teaching his cat to use the guest bathroom
"You have let every orifice rip." -Mom scolding Mikey at Christmas dessert
"No, they pumped enough, it like shoots out at you." -NJKat at Mikey's party
"Can you delete that? I'm ashamed of my fat ass." -Tulika
"I was gonna ask you how big it was, but I decided it'd be wiser to just look." -Andrea
"Why would I go out in public with him?" -Andrea
"You continue doing what you do. That's what you do." -GT-UGA football game announcer
Emily: well, remember, for women, porn comes in the written word
"I can get two at once, two at once people!" -SusanT
"So the 'roids have been f-ing with me again." -Chris
Emily: Hamilton's earlier stuff is just cultural and political interactions, with some dating between humans, werewolves, and vampires. the later books? sex. lots of explicitly detailed sex.
Emily: and then the other series is fairies
Emily: and that's all sex
===New Year's===
"You look so sleazy." -Dwain
"-I- look sleazy?" -Snow
"I look awesome." -Dwain
"It wasn't that bad, I thought it was much worse when I felt my arm down there." -Courtney "It's just white stuff!" -Chris
"Everybody wanted to see Bush. We saw Bush. And it was awesome." -Dwain, about booing Coldplay off the stage to get to the headlining band
"My team is on the DL. ...is that what you people call it?" -Courtney
"I'm sorry we invited you to our Christmas party." -Courtney
"You're the Anne of this year." -Snow to Courtney after she fell down the stairs
"Every time that song's on in the car I feel like I'm being shot at. It's great." -Erin
"It's like Miley Cyrus with three penises." -Dwain about Jonas Brothers
"C-L-T, fill it in! I didn't go to 'clot'." -Erin
"...Oh!" -Dwain
"I'm gonna be drinking as soon as this thing's out of me." -Erin
"Is there a boob option?" -Chris
"My mom says lesbians aren't real." -Courtney
"The Smith men are apparently incredibly virile." -Dwain
"Nobody rocks anymore except for Collective Soul." -Dwain
"He's flown with shivs before." -Erin abt me
"Um... shiMs." -me
"What about this?" -Dwain
"That's a sausage." -Snow
"You can take it all." -Erin
About the creationist museum:
"It's like the RV Hall of Fame in Elkhart, IN." -me
"No, because RVs are REAL!" -Courtney
"Just because Crowley shows up, the word 'sausage' is not automatically funny." -Erin
"We haven't even scotch-guarded the upstairs sofa, 'cause it turns out pregnant women can't even be AROUND the chemicals or it, like, kills the baby." -Erin
"That's like your favorite type of chemicals!" -Courtney
"I KNOW!" -Erin
===TEXTS===
Olivia: A bit like putting ur feet in warm butter?
Pirate: Will a 3way screw up the wedding? Cause me and kestner could eiffle tower that up.
Sean: Dean, Kelly, and i split 3.5 bottles of wine, 6 beers, & 3 shots of vodka last night. This morning there's an uncooked chicken on the kitchen counter,there's salt on my bathroom floor, a george foreman open and possibly broken on the kitchen floor, and Dean's glasses, wallet, and pants on the living room hardwood floor where he passed out by his computer. Wish you were here.
J: Whatever. Once I make my money my days will only consist of martinis sex and great shoes. Sheer bliss.
Green: Hung mike's boxers from rafters in atrium. Now scared we're gonna get in trouble. Whee!
later: Euan calling them "engineering mistletoe."
Kat: IMed. Drinking. Thus, thinking of you. I think that's a compliment.
J: My sisters boss took me out to lunch and said he wanted to buy me a purse... weird? He also bought me five sake bombs.
"That would break your nose, they're still hard balls." -Sean
"It was like a stuttering sheep." -Gina about Brian's rockbanding of "Bad to the Bone"
"Bbbbbbbbbbad to the wooooool..." -Sean
"You couldn't even pull my ass out of a bar long enough to have a kid at 24." -Gina
"He gave you head - how do you feel about that?" -Kristin to Sean
"But it's not hot if you compare it to other places which are hotter." -Lynn
"Vaginas are not a virtue. That's a common mistake." -Sean
"I don't know how you can do that - I can't even cope with three fingers." -Lynn
"Why don't you come back to our place and take off your boxers?" -SusanT
"I even know Bernoulli and I like Jesus." -Our kickball ref, while playing cups
"If he goes to Jarrod, I'm totally saying no." -Rebecca
"I do like the fistfights over the balls." -Lynn watching basketball
"I hear Britney in my boobs." -Gina, who then pulled her headphones out of them
"Me and my mom are going to Clermont, I don't know about you guys." -Rebecca's Sally's Eric
"I'd like to get it to remind me that I AM killing people." -Spam about an engineering ring
"Cottage cheese bothers me because it reminds me of vaginal discharge." -Spam
"Shooting a young buck is like slapping a woman. Sure you can do it..." -Borden
"Any cat's name, if it's in the street, it's named 'thump'." -Borden
"Rebecca!" -Jillian
"What?" -RebeccaK
"Seven plus six IS thirteen!"
"...yeah."
"That sucks!"
"I've never seen anyone give fake head that effectively." -Jillian
"I've gotta see the tongue before I'm really impressed, though." -Bjorn, about a guy dressed in a KISS costume
"You're just getting all these men wrapped around your finger." -me
"They wrap themselves around my finger. I just don't pry them off." -Andrea
"I thought about coming here and apologizing for being late because I had to get my pussy shaved." -Emily, who needed to get her cat's butt trimmed
"Shuo made me put a skirt on, but I'm gonna take it off." -Rebecca
"People who get set on fire die." -RebeccaJ.
"You said dead dog, and I just kind of went with it." -Pottery Meg, who then told a story about a dead cat left in a field
"I am become fail, the destroyer of awesomeness." -Tommy
"Accelerometer sounds like a thing that makes your car go fast." -RebeccaK
"I have an ex-boyfriend who's kind of like a ferret." -Jillian
"Dammit, Edward, get your butt outta her face!" -Girl to guy dancing in front of bus-bar-tour driver
"He ain't got nothing to work with!" -driver
"I'm raping your shirt." -KatieMo to Tommy
"If I'm one day able to move my boobs, you WILL watch. I'll make you." -RyanH
"I euphemism'd your mother." -Spam
"What are you doing? Oh, is that what you're going to bang people with?" -Lydia about Eric mounting a gun made of cardboard
"You're not that old. You're what, like... 27? You're not like 'Mere' old." -RyanH
"Let's see how many times we can eat our poop and poop it back out." -Kristin speaking for her fish pre-birthday
"I think your anus probably thanks you." -Noelle @ Kristin's birthday
"I was the only one who wanted to bootyshake." -Jim's GF @ Kristin's bday
"Don't let her size fool you, she's tricky." -SeanB abt Andrea
"Stop snorting, I'm gonna come at you like a spider monkey." -Mallory
"I like to think it's Alice from the Brady Bunch." -Galen, about "WhoTFis Alice" song
"Now that's a tasty bitch." -Mere
"I have a bruise on my boob from my sister. Right now." -RyanH
"I want to poke something dead." -Tulika
"If I weren't already wetting myself, I would've wet myself." -Jen's Nate
"He's like a young Fidel." -Travis about Chris
"Why are you constantly flicking all the time?" -Tulika
"Fundamentally, I really don't want to be using the same toilet as the cat anyway." -Brian about teaching his cat to use the guest bathroom
"You have let every orifice rip." -Mom scolding Mikey at Christmas dessert
"No, they pumped enough, it like shoots out at you." -NJKat at Mikey's party
"Can you delete that? I'm ashamed of my fat ass." -Tulika
"I was gonna ask you how big it was, but I decided it'd be wiser to just look." -Andrea
"Why would I go out in public with him?" -Andrea
"You continue doing what you do. That's what you do." -GT-UGA football game announcer
Emily: well, remember, for women, porn comes in the written word
"I can get two at once, two at once people!" -SusanT
"So the 'roids have been f-ing with me again." -Chris
Emily: Hamilton's earlier stuff is just cultural and political interactions, with some dating between humans, werewolves, and vampires. the later books? sex. lots of explicitly detailed sex.
Emily: and then the other series is fairies
Emily: and that's all sex
===New Year's===
"You look so sleazy." -Dwain
"-I- look sleazy?" -Snow
"I look awesome." -Dwain
"It wasn't that bad, I thought it was much worse when I felt my arm down there." -Courtney "It's just white stuff!" -Chris
"Everybody wanted to see Bush. We saw Bush. And it was awesome." -Dwain, about booing Coldplay off the stage to get to the headlining band
"My team is on the DL. ...is that what you people call it?" -Courtney
"I'm sorry we invited you to our Christmas party." -Courtney
"You're the Anne of this year." -Snow to Courtney after she fell down the stairs
"Every time that song's on in the car I feel like I'm being shot at. It's great." -Erin
"It's like Miley Cyrus with three penises." -Dwain about Jonas Brothers
"C-L-T, fill it in! I didn't go to 'clot'." -Erin
"...Oh!" -Dwain
"I'm gonna be drinking as soon as this thing's out of me." -Erin
"Is there a boob option?" -Chris
"My mom says lesbians aren't real." -Courtney
"The Smith men are apparently incredibly virile." -Dwain
"Nobody rocks anymore except for Collective Soul." -Dwain
"He's flown with shivs before." -Erin abt me
"Um... shiMs." -me
"What about this?" -Dwain
"That's a sausage." -Snow
"You can take it all." -Erin
About the creationist museum:
"It's like the RV Hall of Fame in Elkhart, IN." -me
"No, because RVs are REAL!" -Courtney
"Just because Crowley shows up, the word 'sausage' is not automatically funny." -Erin
"We haven't even scotch-guarded the upstairs sofa, 'cause it turns out pregnant women can't even be AROUND the chemicals or it, like, kills the baby." -Erin
"That's like your favorite type of chemicals!" -Courtney
"I KNOW!" -Erin
===TEXTS===
Olivia: A bit like putting ur feet in warm butter?
Pirate: Will a 3way screw up the wedding? Cause me and kestner could eiffle tower that up.
Sean: Dean, Kelly, and i split 3.5 bottles of wine, 6 beers, & 3 shots of vodka last night. This morning there's an uncooked chicken on the kitchen counter,there's salt on my bathroom floor, a george foreman open and possibly broken on the kitchen floor, and Dean's glasses, wallet, and pants on the living room hardwood floor where he passed out by his computer. Wish you were here.
J: Whatever. Once I make my money my days will only consist of martinis sex and great shoes. Sheer bliss.
Green: Hung mike's boxers from rafters in atrium. Now scared we're gonna get in trouble. Whee!
later: Euan calling them "engineering mistletoe."
Kat: IMed. Drinking. Thus, thinking of you. I think that's a compliment.
J: My sisters boss took me out to lunch and said he wanted to buy me a purse... weird? He also bought me five sake bombs.
posted by DCrowley at 8:01 AM
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